Member-only story
Burned Out
The internal monologue of a stress related panic attack
*Warning: This post discusses and illustrates depression, anxiety and high levels of stress. This may be triggering to some readers. Please read at your discretion*
I decided to let myself type out my internal monologue as I was going through a stress related anxiety attack. It actually was quite cathartic and helpful to write everything down as I was feeling it. I highly recommend doing this and then either deleting the file or burning the paper.
Too tired. I feel like my bones are made of lead and my muscles are old, frayed rubber bands with no life left in them. My body feels like it doesn’t work.
At work. The phone won’t stop ringing. I don’t want to deal with people’s problems right now. I don’t care about them. That guy has his ringtone up too high. Do this. Do that. Where’s my appointment? How much longer? Do you work here? Are you okay? I’m sorry I just can’t talk about it.
Can’t talk about it. Must keep going. Need to make others see that I’m strong. Need to be stronger. I am too weak. I am fraying paper from an old book left yellowed in the sun. I wish I could do more.
Gotta do more. Can’t stop now or I’ll be forced to acknowledge how I feel.
